Irvy, called Taokaka (duokinneas) wrote in rurounisues,
Irvy, called Taokaka
duokinneas
rurounisues

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First day of July, and we're stuck with an awful example like this

Story Or Series Title: A simple wish. Nice capitalization there, honey. You made it nice and obvious what kind of Sue we're dealing with here.
Fandom:
Culprit Author's Name: bluebear66. You know that once you start getting into the numbers and bizarre color combinations, you have an interesting, potentially dangerous author running amok. In fact, she has three more horrors like this one, although we can be thankful that they're all, except this one, under 150 words.

Full Name (plus titles if any): Julie Bagota.
Full Species(es): "phyicologist." Somebody please tell me what kind of career this is, as I've never heard of it before. And apparently the Suethor hasn't heard of spell and grammar checking.
Hair Color (include adjectives): Not described.
Eye Color (include adjectives): Also not described.
Unusual Markings/Colorations: None so far, thank the Gods.
Special Possessions (if any): Again, nothing so far. There are so few details in this story that we're thankfully spared hearing about any magnificent powers or spiffy artifacts.

Annoying Origin: America; that's all we know. According to Kenshin, "this is very strange"."this seems like a western home". (Her punctuation, not mine.)
Annoying Connections To Canon Characters: They pop up in her garden. Uh-huh, I really believe that just because she wished she could have fun (''I wish that something strange will happen so that I can have fun again''.) That's her punctuation again.
Annoying Special Abilities: Having the Kenshin-gumi trust her and follow her into her house without question, then taking them with her to the supermarket in her SUV.
Other Annoying Traits: The Kenshin-gumi can suddenly, inexplicably speak English even though they live in Meiji-jidai Japan.

Please include a small sample of the worst of this story: Oh, trust me, it's so short that each chapter is painful, but I managed to decide on one. For your viewing displeasure...

Your're gonna LOVE this trip!" julie exclaimed. She started her SUV and sano screamed even more. At least she knows the difference between "you're" and "your." But that doesn't give her any extra points.

"Come on sano, dont worry." "This car is non-hautable and perfectly safe.Now here." julie strapped on his belt.

"it's gonna be okay" she said in a loving tone while smiling.She saw that he was blushing.she chuckled. Because you know, Sano understands English perfectly and is actually flattered when random women hit on him for no reason.

"NOW LET'SSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS GO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

heart of sword playing Oh, great, fangirlish inclusions. Next you're going to tell me that they're all singing along because they "know the song."

she was doing 60mph when she got to the skyway(in my town,there's a big skyway called the pulaski) Even more evidence of a Sue. Not only is it an author's note, it's about the Suethor herself.

her passesgers were screaming bloody murder. sano was petrefied. Soon she got to walmart(walmart so big,they sure to get lost)

"was'nt that fun?"julie said. "yyyyyeah." kenshin, karou, and yahiko said. sano could'nt even speak.

It took a while getting sano out, but it was possible.......................

In the supermarket

"Cleanup at isle 5, Cleanup at isle 5".

Okay,im isigning kenshin to get the cleaning suppiles,karou to get the milk items,yahiko to get the snacks,and sano to get the meats. Oh, sure, they're totally comfortable in Wal-Mart of all places. After they've been in the United States for what, ten minutes, they suddenly feel the need to go grocery shopping? And they aren't terrified out of their minds?

i'll be getting the vegetables and fruits.Let's move out.And stay out of trouble.

kenshin.......

hmmmmmm.........miss julie said to get this soap but this one is better,and this one is much better than this one. I don't recall her introducing herself. And I don't recall Kenshin knowing anything about modern products.

I know these things,im a expert at it.but she might get mad at me if i dont get this one.I know miss karou will.let me take them all.Then miss julie wont get mad.

karou........ WHO?!

brrrrrrrr.its cooooold here.And sooo many things to choose from.might as well take them all.And FAST! or i'll

freeeeeeeze here.

yahiko.......

WHOA! look at all this stuff! it'll take a while to take them,but i am yahiko miojin, samurai of tyoko.I could do anything! Oh, Yahiko-kun... This just
hurts.

sano........

SO.MUCH.FOOD!!!!! GOTTA.TAKE.ALL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! This only adds to the hurt and insult.

At the cashier counter

Okay,so how much is it all? And who's talking here?

cashier: $1000. Mm-hmm, an
even thousand. No tax or anything. Oh, well, this is easier on the Suethor brain.

julie froze.

ath,ath,ath,ath........

could I take back some things? Could you take back your fic?

hehehehehheheheheheheheheheh. funniest chapter yet.


She's probably going to update soon, too, with even more horrors. Of course, it was published all today, so maybe - with luck - she'll abandon it immediately afterwards. I doubt it, though.
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